People in the UK are cutting back on socialising as the cost of living crisis continues to squeeze incomes and force people to cut back wherever possible. Fuel costs mean that many are unable to go out regularly, while pubs and restaurants report struggling to break even as footfall plummets.
Here, five people describe how rising costs are affecting their ability to spend time with family and friends, as well as the impact on their wellbeing.
‘Having contact with family shouldn’t be a luxury’
Caroline used to meet up with family and friends every weekend; she would go out with her husband for a drink or a bite to eat regularly. “We weren’t partygoers, out every night of week, but life was very different – we might have been out a couple of times a week,” the 54-year-old dental nurse in Hertfordshire says. Now, she has stopped that and can only afford to drive to Kent to see family and friends once a month.
The progression to “thinking about every single penny” happened over several months. “Before, it was not even thinking about going out. Then it was ‘we’ve had dinner out, best not do that’. Now I’m thinking to myself, god, it’s going to cost so much money to visit Mum and Dad. Having contact with family shouldn’t be a luxury.” It is August, but she is already worried about Christmas – being able to afford to take over “a couple of bottles, gifts and some chocolates”.
“Life has become a lot lonelier,” she says. “I feel quite isolated … Speaking on the phone is not the same as human contact and spending time out. The joy has gone out of life for so many people.”
‘I won’t be able to go out for a meal in winter’
View image in fullscreenVicky Hughes. Photograph: Vicky Hughes
Last November, Vicky Hughes, a 30-year-old freelance illustrator, moved to Leeds with her partner as they were no longer able to afford to live in London. “It’s been quite hard to meet people with money on our mind as we socialise,” Hughes says, though she adds that she has recently made new friends after joining a co-working studio with a three-month discount. “We’re trying to do as much as possible to get to know people now. I’m not sure about socialising in winter when it’s too cold to sit outside and do all the free things that summer offers. I won’t be able to go for a night out or meal in the winter, because I’ll have to pay for heating instead.
“Over lockdown we got used to doing nothing and I’m preparing for another mini-lockdown again over winter in terms of socialising. I’m not a party animal but I like to see friends a few times a week. Lockdown affected my wellbeing a lot – I got quite bad depression.”
‘I shouldn’t socially isolate, but you don’t get much choice’
Natalie Martin, 46, is worried about the effect of a narrowing social life on her mental health. “I feel socially isolated, really – it has affected my confidence greatly. With autism you follow routine behaviour, and not going out and seeing people is a dangerous routine to fall into,” says Martin, who lives in supported accommodation in Lancashire. “It leads to a spiral of anxiety and depression that I’ve [experienced] before. Part of my diagnosis is that I shouldn’t socially isolate, but you don’t get much choice.”
Martin says rising costs, including increased social care charges, have left her stuck at home. “Before, I used to get out more – I’d go into Blackpool town centre, I’d occasionally eat out, and I’d travel to Liverpool every other week to see my dad,” she says. She now cannot afford the train fare and he drives to see her once a month instead. “The only occasions I go out now is to the supermarket, and to keep my sanity I try to get out and have a walk. You tend to feel we’re still under [Covid] restrictions, – because of the financial side.”
‘Overtime is becoming a necessity – I have little time to socialise’
For John, a 54-year-old Royal Mail postal worker in Berkshire, working six days a week leaves little time for socialising. “I’ve been regularly working overtime for a while,” he says. “Before, if you felt you didn’t want to, you didn’t have to – now you feel it’s more necessary with rising energy bills. I scramble to get the extra hours in each week. My typical working week averages about 55 hours, and this just allows me to stay on top of household bills and food for my family, but leaves very little margin for any extras.”
His work schedule leaves little time for outings on his day off, which usually is spent doing domestic tasks such as the food shop. But John, who enjoys going to watch cricket in London, has felt the difference when he’s had time off. “I’m less inclined to organise things because of cost. I’ve not got as much to look forward to. I do long six-day weeks and I can’t claim I’m struggling to cover the basics, but to try to get beyond that and have some funds to eat out or pursue a new hobby – it’s a barrier. My mindset is now just go to work, do long hours, pay for basics, don’t expect more.”
‘The easy option is not to go’
Rising costs mean that Susan, a 41-year-old travel agent in Glasgow, is making excuses to avoid seeing friends as she says she is the only one in her circle struggling to make ends meet. Although she says her social life was “never raucous” with three young children, costs have increased on such a “rapid trajectory” this summer that she now has “zero disposable income”. “Even inviting people to my place and serving pizza just isn’t possible,” she says.
In the last year her friends have “got back into the routine of going out together”, she says. “I can’t make it, because I don’t have 20 quid to sit in a pub for a couple of hours.” Susan says her excuses for not going out are wearing thin. “I don’t want them to say, don’t worry, I’ll sub you 20 quid, so there’s no one I’ve said to why I’m genuinely not coming out. This summer I’ve noticed a lot of stuff happening that I’m not a part of. The easy option is not to go.”
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